Christmas Pies - Week #10

There was a lot of pie making going on for me this week.  As I mentioned in last Wednesday's Next Week's Pie post, my plan was to make two pies for our family holiday get together.  I will admit to feeling some pressure to perform, given the audience (see rule #7).  But, despite the impression that this blog gives, I do have a modicum of pride, so it was not merely fear of my sisters that motivated me.  I also wanted to feel good about what I was serving up to my family during the holidays.

I can affirm that I accomplished the goal of making two pies.  The rest, well... you be the judge.

Pie #1 - Grasshopper

I made the two pies at different times (this one was technically during last week's timeframe, last Friday night, but I thought it was worth writing about anyway).  The Egg Nog pie I made on Saturday morning.

There were a lot of different grasshopper pie recipes, but I eventually settled on this one, using the basic crumb crust found here (the recipe calls for a prepared crust, and we all know rule #7), with an assist from the recipe for the crust of the grasshopper pie here.  Believe me, it sounds more complicated than it is.  If it wasn't simple, someone named Simple Simon couldn't possibly pull it off.  It ain't just a nickname folks, it's a way of life -- Simon the Simpleton would be as accurate.

I was fired up about making the grasshopper pie.  Just the thought of it takes me back to drinking grasshoppers after Christmas dinners at my grandparents' many years ago.  

The recipe seemed simple enough.  If anything, I was a little bit worried about how melting a metric ton of marshmallows would go.  I had made a chocolate crumb crust once before, for the peanut butter cup pie, and so I wasn't too worried about that.  The only real modification that I made was that I stole the idea of incorporating coffee into the crust from third recipe linked above and again here.  I just reduced the amount of butter by one tablespoon and replaced it with a tablespoon of water/instant coffee, which seemed to work out just fine.  I'm not a coffee drinker, and I'm not sure in the end if adding the coffee to the crust was or wasn't a good idea, but I wanted to try it.  Since this entire escapade is about just that, trying it, I did.

The Lesson Learned?

As with the great majority of the pies I've constructed so far, this one provided me with a good lesson.  I could spin off into some mildly incoherent digression about pie and the meaning of life here, but I'll save those insights for another day.  Instead, I'll just say that as in life, patience in pie making can indeed prove to be virtuous.

I will preface by stating that I originally did not think that the recipe itself was clear enough about the proper technique and timing for combining the whipped cream with the mint/marshmallow mixture.  After looking again, I think that the problem was simply that I didn't (don't) follow directions very well and let my impatience get the best of me.  Regardless, I will continue under the plausible assumption that anyone who either a) can read, or b) knows what they are doing wouldn't experience the problem that I did.

Here's what it boils down to (bad pseudo-pun intended, I suppose).  I failed to let the marshmallow mixture cool sufficiently before folding the whipped cream into it.  As I started the process this did not appear to be an issue, but by the time I was ready to put the filling in the crust, I had a congealed, coagulated chemistry experiment gone bad.  My long list of Duh! moments grows ever longer with the addition of this kitchen nightmare.  How hard can it be?  Just read and follow the simple instructions!  Simpleton hardly covers it.   

I could actually see the components separating as I poured/scooped the grasshopper filling into the pie shell.  Here's a look at the strange resulting texture/consistency.  In addition to the lumpiness, there was a noticeable separation of solid from liquid.

The looks of the pie didn't give me a warm, fuzzy feeling.  However, I decided to let it set up over night and if it seemed to have set would take it to along.  If it did not set, I planned to feed it to some neighborhood dog and whip up a new one in the morning.  It is probably worth noting that I was pretty sure that I knew what I had done wrong almost immediately.  Some things, like the mystery of the bubbled pie crust are just that, a mystery, to me.  The cause of this, however, was quickly apparent.

Saturday morning arrived, and the filling had set up, or at least seemed set enough to try to eat.  I decided that even if it didn't really turn out, I should still take this pie to show my family.  I'm exposing pictures and descriptions of pies, both good and bad, here in this blog anyway.  In the end there is no hiding, no secrets.  No reason to be anything but transparent with my own family.  "I come bearing pies, some more edible than others..."

Saturday evening we decided to try this pie out with my parents.  As long as the lights were low, you didn't look too closely, and I sprinkled the top of the pie with peppermint candies, it didn't actually look all that bad.  

Oh, but what lurks under the surface!  The top set up, despite the strange texture and consistency, but it definitely separated.  The bottom of the pie, which you can see below, was very runny, and actually leaked into the bottom crust, making it really soggy.

This was definitely not the pie that I had hoped for.  But, it was the pie that I made.  No sense hiding from it, it's just pie.

Despite this pie's deficiencies, I actually thought it tasted pretty good.  There were some who thought the mint/creme de menthe flavor was too strong (again, my lead taster with her delicate palate), but others who've had a grasshopper mixed up by my paternal grandfather thought it was just about right.  I really wish that I would have done a better job in making it so that it would have gotten a fair assessment.  Maybe another week.

Pie #2 - Egg Nog

I am not a fan of egg nog, so this pie choice was completely driven by a request from my younger sister.  I was actually quite pleased with how this one turned out.  I hope that she enjoyed eating it as much as I enjoyed making it.

I found the recipe that I used for egg nog pie here.  I was enthused about a few things regarding this pie:

1. It calls for a prebaked crust and so I would be able to
   
   1. further experiment with crust making
   2. finally use the ceramic pie weights that I had purchased (see a picture below)
      
2. It uses a similar process to the grasshopper pie for the filling (an opportunity for redemption)
   
3. It was my second pie of the weekend that contains alcohol as an ingredient.  Even I know that a baker's pies are better received if the recipient has had a nip of the sauce.
   

Crust

I'm starting to really settle into a groove with the crust making.  I didn't alter the standard recipe very much.  I stuck with butter and vegetable shortening, but used an even ratio of vodka and rum for the liquid, hoping that the rum flavor would accent the egg nog.  As it turned out, those who tasted the pie didn't think that you could taste the rum in the crust.  Oh well, I guess I will just have to try again on some future as-yet unknown pie.

The most exciting thing about the crust was the opportunity to bake it without filling -- in other words, use the pie weights!

Ready to bake -

Pie weights -

I bought these ceramic weights about a month ago and hadn't had a chance to use them yet.  I'm not sure they work any better than dry beans or rice, as I've seen recommended in other places, but I sure felt cool using them.

Baked - 

The weights did their job well.

The Learned Lesson!

The similarity in the process of making the filling for the two pies for this week were that in each case a thickening agent is made through a heating process and then whipped cream is added to that thickening agent to produce the final product.  So, I really did think of this pie as an opportunity to make amends for my mistakes on the grasshopper pie.

I learned my lesson and took plenty of time to let the thickening component cool before folding in the whipped cream this time and it resulted in a really nice, fluffy filling.  Apparently I don't always make the same mistake over and over until I'm asked to leave the kitchen.

I stated earlier that I don't love egg nog, and I found that I don't love egg nog pie either.  However, I do think that this was my best constructed pie so far.  The crust was good, maybe even very good and the filling turned out very well.  My family said that they enjoyed the taste and consistency, and I thought it turned out to be quite aesthetically pleasing.  All in all, I thought it was really a step in the right direction and an affirmation that I might eventually get the hang of all of this!

Here is a picture of the finished pie

and, a profile of a slice

Additional stupid/weird pie-related things that I did this week and left out (until now):

• Despite bets being taken in my living room that it would take somewhere between 15 and 20 years for me to complete, I whipped both pie's whipped cream from heavy whipping cream using a hand whisk.  As with many things that I do, especially when it comes to pie making and this blog, there wasn't any compelling reason to whip it by hand, I just thought it would be interesting.  By the way, it did not take even 15 years to finish, although I admit that it's a good workout.
  

I received several wonderful pie baking accessories as Christmas gifts.  They'll be appearing as the weeks progress.  Stay tuned.